A Rescue Mission
by Myriad Dewdrop
Summary: The twins unknowingly use dark magic to enchant the castle as a prank, what will happen to the one trapped inside?  And how will the trio be able to save them when they are lost themselves?  Set in 6th year, not HBP compliant
1. Chapter 1

Summary: The twins unknowingly use dark magic to enchant the castle as a prank, what will happen to the one trapped inside? And how will the trio be able to save them when they are lost themselves? Set in 6th year, not HBP compliant

**Disclaimer:** Everything belongs to JK Rowling and I just use her characters for fun.

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It had been a late night for the students. They had been allowed to go to Hogsmeade, and were permitted to stay out later than usual as it was confirmed that Voldemort was elsewhere. Harry, Ron, and Hermione were, as usual, talking and laughing together. The only downside to their day was that Fred and George's new shop had not opened yet (they had bought out Zonko's.) It had made Ron rather angry as he was hoping to glean some puking pastils for the next charms class; he was not ready for their chapter test. It was only when the students approached the castle that they realized something was severely wrong.

"Oh blow me down on the sea, I knew she was a pretty, so I sat in my house and dressed like a mouse and sang a little ditty!" it sounded like Hagrid was drunk again, "OH! Yo ho, yo ho I crack my knuckles naught, I sat with a keg and a really bad egg an' I thought of my sweetie." It was not Hagrid, to the many students surprise, but the castle itself. The gathered group could plainly see it swaying back and front, the doors to the Great Hall swinging open and closed with the words, and two lamp lights up in the top floors, that seemed to be serving as eyes, flickering with the melody. It also did not escape the students notice that everyone else (the teachers, ghosts, and even the house elves) seemed to be standing outside the castle as well. Dumbledore himself was even there and he seemed to be scolding two redheads.

"Fred, George!" Ron yelled delightedly, "I need some puking pastils!" as the trio approached Dumbledore silenced Ron with a very grave stare. "Oh, er, sorry Professor Dumbledore, sir."

Dumbledore turned his back on them and continued speaking very seriously to the twins. "As amusing as this would have been boys, Professor Snape is trapped. He was not expelled from the building like the rest of us. We need him, he is a very important man, and not to mention one of my dearest friends. So how," and at this point Dumbledore's voice grew louder, the anger barely contained, "are we going to fix this?!"

"Erm," suggested Fred, "We could try talking to it, see if it'll let any of us in to go and get him."

"We're very sorry, Professor Dumbledore, we had no idea that the castle would keep one of you. At least it's not yourself." Said George and Fred nodded in agreement.

"Alas," replied Dumbledore, "I would have rather it been me. The memories Severus has of alcohol related incidents, are not good ones. Well? Go and talk to it then, it's your creation it will most likely listen to you."

After much elbowing and nay saying Fred was reluctantly elected to be the speaker. "Uhm, excuse me, Mr. Castle?" started off Fred.

The castle immediately stopped singing to look down at him, "Yes?" he asked in a rather groggy manner.

"Well, we were just wondering, um, you seem to have one of are men, and um we'd like, well we'd like him back, is there any chance of us sending someone in to fetch him?" answered Fred respectfully.

The castle seemed to ponder this, "The one you wish to rescue is mine to torment, only one who has a life debt to this man can come to try and save him. That is Magic Law."

Fred seemed quite stunned, he had not known that he and his brother had been dappling in ancient dark magic when they animated the castle. Perhaps they should spend more time researching than testing, it was worth consideration. He turned back to Dumbledore and mouthed, "Know anyone?" But Albus shook his head. In fact it was not until Hermione came forward that Fred received an answer.

"Fred," she whispered, "Snape saved Harry's life in first year, he was constantly protecting him, do you think that'll work?"

"I don't know," replied Fred, "Professor Dumbledore, do you think Harry's first year'll count? Or do you think since Snape was trying to repay James…?" Fred trailed off.

Albus looked contemplative for a second and then said, "I believe Mr. Weasley, that debts are nullified after one dies, so therefore Severus' protection of Harry during that time should count for something. Does it castle?"

The castle, who had been listening intensely, said "That would not count, it was merely protection; I believe the girl there was the real reason that Harry did not lose his life. However, this boy is in debt to Severus Snape for another time. So are several others of your students. If you can figure out what this moment was I will allow not only one, but any three of your choosing to enter the castle and rescue your friend."

The group sat in silence for a long time, each member racked their brain for an answer, but none were forthcoming. It was not until Neville approached Professor Dumbledore that an answer was reached. Neville whispered his guess into the Headmaster's ear. After listening intently Dumbledore nodded and told Neville to tell the others what he thought. "Well," began Neville nervously, avoiding Harry's gaze because he knew that this would upset him, "my guess is, well last year. He was the one that alerted the Order about us going off to fight Voldemort at the ministry. If they hadn't of come we would have been in a lot of trouble and would have probably been killed." Neville had been right, this didn't please Harry, for to him it was still all Snape's fault that Sirius had died that day. The castle, however, seemed to see things in a different light as it smiled and said,

"Yes, yes. You are quite clever, young man. That answer is correct three of you from that group may enter." There was a shocked silence and then Ron declared,

"Looks like this is a job for the Golden Trio!" At this Hermione snorted and Harry shook his head, but they knew that out of the bunch of them they were the group that had jelled the best and therefore could take on the challenge the easiest.

Dumbledore looked questioningly at Harry, who although amused at Ron's outburst, did not seem too pleased by the prospect of rescuing Snape. "Harry?" he questioned, "Please try. We need him, you know that, please put your grudge aside for now." His words seemed to work and Harry nodded at him. "Castle, we have, made our decision, Harry, Ron, and Hermione would like to enter and rescue Severus."

"So be it," replied the Castle. "They may enter." And with those words the doors swung open to admit the three students. Harry, Ron, and Hermione trudged up the walkway, looked at each other, and entered together.

The inside of the castle was dimly lit, and smelled heavily of alcohol. Once inside a voice, presumably the castle's thoughts, spoke. "Now that you are inside, many tricks I have up my sleeves, let's see what happens when I separate these three. Once apart, you must find each other. Not until all three reunite will you have a chance to find the one you seek." And as the thoughts finished a gust of wind tore through the corridors and blew them all to different sections of the castle. This was going to be a more difficult task then Harry, or the others for that matter, had thought.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** All the Harry Potter characters and world belongs to JK Rowling, and anything that I do with them is only for amusement.

Harry, as it happened, was blown up to Trelawney's tower. Not exactly his favorite place to pass the time, but far better than the History of Magic Classroom, where even the spiders had left due to utter boredom. The place still smelled like incense and perfume, which reminded Harry ever so slightly of his dreadful time at Madame Puddifoots. It also made him wonder if Professor Trelawney frequented there, thus causing the identical smell. As he poked and prodded around for the trapdoor, a thought struck him. "The Room of Requirement," Harry said to no one in particular, "perfect place to find all that you need, isn't it?" _Clunk_

Harry had released the trapdoor, causing an updraft of putrid air to fill the classroom. The scent was a peculiar mix of stomach acid and margarita; it appeared the castle was starting to take on heavier drinks as the moon rose higher into the sky. As Harry descended the ladder, his mind was not full of foolish thoughts. He knew that entering The Room of Requirement would not make either Ron or Hermione pop up out of thin air. He was, however, hoping that the room could give him some guidance as to where he could find them. It was this thought that brought him to its door several minutes later, slightly out of breath and panting for air.

As expected the door opened to reveal what he needed most. When Harry stepped into the room he saw, at its center, a large basin. 'That's funny,' thought Harry, 'I don't need a drink.' Nevertheless he approached it, and upon looking into it found what he was searching for. He only had a few seconds to glance at it though, because the castle, upon realizing his location, shouted rather loudly at him.

"Hey, you! What do you think you're doing in there – that's cheating! Get out!" And with those words Harry was met with another gust of wind, which this time landed him inside the Gryffindor common room. Thanking his lucky stars that he hadn't landed in some unidentifiable broom closet, Harry stood up and began wracking his brain to recall the images he had just seen of his two friends. Hermione had been a blur, and judging by what had just happened to him, Harry guessed that she too had been in an out of bounds place and had been in transit while he was looking in the basin. Harry deduced that she must have been in the library looking up a way to disenchant the castle; he therefore decided that he would not go there to look for her. Ron's image, however, had been perfectly clear. Ron had appeared to be sitting against a wall, and wearing a saucepan on his head.

Hoping that on the way he would bump into Hermione, Harry set off towards the kitchens at breakneck speed. Upon approaching the last staircase, however, a strange sight met his eyes. There appeared to be a waterfall of tequila cascading down the stairs. It wasn't coming from anywhere in particular; it just seemed to be shimmering its way down the steps, originating at the top of the first one. Harry knitted his eyebrows in puzzlement towards it, wondering if the steps were indeed safe, or if he'd have to find another way to the kitchens. As if to answer his unspoken question, the tequila began to move, and eventually settled on molding itself into the shape of a cat. The cat gazed at him, licking its paw disdainfully. "Well?" it said, with a deep voice of feminine quality, "What brings you here? Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the company, but I am quite the curious being." She purred, rolling on her back, trying to look harmless and playful, yet not quite fooling Harry's instincts.

Harry figured he'd get straight to the point, so he replied with, "I'm looking for my friend. I think he's in the kitchen, may I pass?" The cat raised her eyebrows and asked innocently,

"But why would you have to look for your friend? You are the great Harry Potter; your friend should be looking for you. That is, if he is indeed a friend. Why don't you stay put for awhile? If you don't go anywhere sooner or later your friends are bound to find you." She smiled, sending a shimmer through her translucent, golden fur. Despite the friendly air the cat had taken when she said all those things, Harry was still quite riled.

"Just because I am Harry Potter does not make me 'special' or excuse me from my duties as a friend!" shouted Harry, quite fed up with people – or in this one odd instance a cat – treating him like some saint. "And what," huffed Harry, "makes you say that Ron isn't a true friend?"

"Well," said the cat delicately, gazing at her claws. "He does have a soft spot for that Granger girl, doesn't he? Perhaps they are making out in there, and in that case it is best not to disturb them, don't you think dear? I mean, waiting here for the both of them couldn't possibly interfere with there business, and once they appear you can go and search for that Snape fellow. Besides, I do so enjoy your company, please say you'll stay." Harry was beginning to understand the cat's game now; hers was the game of any alcohol. If he stuck around her too long, Harry knew he'd be provoked into doing something rash, thus delaying their progress on the mission further.

"Oh yeah? Well I don't enjoy your company very much," Harry stated, and as he did so the cat's eyes flared. "I need to find my friend, excuse me." But as Harry tried to push past the cat, it hissed and blocked his path.

"No one dislikes my company, Potter! No one! You shall not get past me, no matter how hard you try." She snarled, positioning herself to pounce.

Harry pulled out his wand, he was unsure of what hexes to use, so he went with the first one that came to mind, "Stupefy!" Unfortunately, this did nothing but cause the cat to splatter; she regained her form mere seconds later, and fixed him with a cocky grin.

"How charming, you aim not to kill, do you Potter? Well believe me; I have no such chivalrous codes in my fighting technique." She began to prepare her pounce once more, and Harry knew he would drown if she landed on his face. This thought struck Harry funny, and inspired him to think on a different route of thought. His opponent was a liquid, no an alcohol. 'But what weakens alcohol?' He thought. The answer came to him just as she sprang forward, hurtling towards his face.

"Aqua Vitae!" Shouted Harry, and a jet of water streamed out of his wand, encircling the cat and pinning her down. He stepped over to her and saw to his satisfaction that the water had begun to dilute her. She would be no threat to him now, and so he headed down the stairs and through a few more corridors until he came to a painting with a bowl of fruit in it. Harry tickled the pear and was immediately granted access to the gigantic kitchens. As he wandered the room it was not long until he realized just how much of it he had never seen. He had always been in the entrance, being waited on hand and foot by House Elves, and now, well, he found himself at quite the loss. At this rate, Harry was beginning to think that he would never find Ron, or that Ron had possibly left while the cat had been taking up his time. 'Damn that cat,' Harry thought, searching for any signs of pots that had collapsed, remembering Ron's unique headgear in the basin. Minutes later Harry's nerves were beginning to wear thin, he was even considering risking going back to The Room of Requirement just to catch another glimpse in the basin. Then, just as he was about to turn around and leave a piercing shriek halted his steps. Another sent Harry rushing towards the voice, now positively identified as Ron's. Harry was now running past icebox after icebox, fireplace after fireplace, all to get to his final destination, which was a massive cauldron.

"Harry!" shouted Ron, from the cauldron, his voice full of hysteria, "Harry, you've got to stop him, he's going to light the fire!" The 'he' that Ron was referring to was, to Harry's surprise, a giant swine adorned with a chef's hat and apron. He winked at Harry and said cheerfully,

"It's the redheads that always make the spiciest gumbo!"

The swine stood erect at the cauldron; in his left hoof he held a ladle, while the right one was curled around a torch. Harry's jaw dropped in horror, his best friend was about to be cooked alive, by a swine nonetheless! What had Dumbledore gotten them into? For the second time that night Harry raised his wand and shouted, "Aqua Vitae!" Water shot again from his wand, this time incasing not a cat, but the wood that was underneath the cauldron.

"Hey, now, that's not nice! You dampened my wood! You'll pay, for sure!" At this the swine turned towards the counter, opened a draw, and began to rummage for something. Harry had just managed to free Ron when the swine appeared to have found what he was looking for. "Oh, so you both want to play, eh? Well, come on then – give it your best shot." The 'something' that the swine had been looking for was a rather nasty looking cleaver. He licked the blade in what would have been a threatening manner, had he not accidentally severed part of his tongue off in the process. "OH, Merrlwin!" squealed the swine in agony, "It stin-es, it stin-es!"

Ron seemed to be rather enjoying himself, and his look of glee intensified once he had located his wand and sent a stunning hex at the then wailing swine. As it hit, the swine crashed to the floor, a faint trickle of blood coming from his mouth as his partial tongue continued to bleed. "Come on," Ron said, turning to Harry. "Let's find Hermione."

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**A/N:** Hello, hello! Thank you to all that reviewed, and/or added me to your favorites, or my story to your alerts. You make a fanfic author very happy! Now, to answer some questions – yes, you will see what Snape is going through, however that will be some chapters ahead. All I wanted you to pick up about the castle was that it was enchanted with ancient dark magic. Why Dumbledore reacted the way he did will become clearer later, as many things often do with Dumbledore. Neville, is an excellent point, however in my manner of thinking I would say that he would be willing to join the Order, and probably will or if not, at least be part of the final battle in the real series. Hence I jumped ahead with him a bit. I did not really think that Snape's title being revealed would be a big deal as, well, who, except those necessary, would want to be around an angry Dumbledore? I was picturing their group a bit more secluded, sorry if I didn't make that clear. I hope that helped answer some of your questions, stay tuned for more installments, as I quite enjoy writing this and do not foresee any writer's block. With several chapters planned out, who could, eh? Have a good, no, great day everyone!


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer**: All of the HP world and characters belong to JK Rowling, I just like to play with them.

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With a thump Ron landed in the kitchen. "Blimey," he said, taking in the scenery around him. It looked almost like a fortress would, big, well stocked, and full to the brim with shiny metal things (in this case pots and pans, not swords). And yet, despite all the clutter it still seemed rather empty; with no House Elves to frequent it, the kitchen seemed lonely, like it was a ship waiting to be manned.

Ron stood up, eager to explore his new surroundings, and of course to find Harry and Hermione, whom he hoped were somewhere nearby. As Ron began walking about he realized that he had never even come close to seeing the entirety of the place, and therefore he knew that it would not be easy to find a way out. After a few minutes of walking, Ron's eyes were drawn to what looked like an enormous sink. He was so drawn to it, in fact that he failed to notice a little man dining at a small table nearby.

"Oy, there!" shouted the little man, who was indeed Peeves. Ron jumped up in fright, looking as though he had just been electrocuted. In his haste to see whom it was who spoke, Ron slipped on some renegade soapy water, flew through the giant drying rack, and tumbled with a nasty crack into the wall with a pan adorning his head.

"Ron Weasley, Ron Weasley, a pot's on your head," sang Peeves, hovering above Ron with a smirk. "You keep roaming here and you'll be better off dead. A castle, a castle's caught Professor Snape. If you saw into his mind now your mouth would be agape." At this point he started cackling, and then he suddenly swooped down and took the pot in his hand. "Nice hardware, you've got hear. This type of metal," and Peeves struck it with his index finger causing it to resonate loudly, "holds heat very well. Good hat choice, Mr. Weasley it is quite stylish."

"You wear it then," said Ron despondently from the floor, "I'm sure it'll look better on you." It was to Ron's surprise that when he pulled himself up off the floor he found that Peeves was sitting cross legged in the air and smiling at him.

"Ahh, a gift from Mr. Weasley, how splendid, how splendid. I'll keep this in mind when you ask me for a favor."

Ron was confused by this and so he voiced his doubts, "_When_ I ask you for a favor? What do you mean by _when_?"

Peeves smile broadened at this, "Never mind, Mr. Weasley, never mind – I dare say you'll know when the time comes what to ask me for – and it won't be a pair of woolen socks, that's for sure!" And cackling once more Peeves sped off into the distance. There was crash shortly afterward and Ron could just make out Peeves' swearing over the now cascading dishware which had once been piled high to the ceiling.

Ron's stomach gurgled. 'Fine time to be hungry,' he thought, deciding that he might as well grab a bite to eat if he were going to be stuck in this labyrinth of a kitchen for a while.

Ten minutes later Ron had still not found any food, or any sign of a way out, and he was beginning to grow frustrated. Letting out a sigh of frustration he spoke aloud to no one in particular. "It's a bloody kitchen. You'd think that they'd have some ruddy food around here!"

"Ah, sir," that no one in particular he had been talking to was very rapidly becoming someone in particular. "If you would have a seat I can serve you whatever it is you would like." The voice had come from behind Ron and had frozen him in his tracks. He turned around slowly and found that the owner of the voice was indeed a pig. He was a rather large pig; he stood on his hind legs, was adorned with an apron and a chef's hat, and seemed to be rather friendly looking. Ron sighed in relief, he was glad to see that there was at least someone in the castle that could help him. "Just sit right here," the pig said, motioning for Ron to sit at a table that had been slightly to the left of where Ron had been going. "There, now that's jolly, isn't it? Very cozy, all right sir," grinned the pig whipping out a notebook from his apron pocket, "what would you like to eat?"

"Got any roasted chicken?" asked Ron, "And, and some of that bread with the little candies in it?"

"Ah yes, sir – some chicken and bobka for you! Now, would you like anything to drink with that?" The pig was so calm and passionate about his job that it brought a smile to Ron's face. It was never like this at home, no one had ever specifically catered to him and only him, and honestly Ron loved the attention very much.

"Got any Chizzy's Cherry Bliss soda?"

"Oh yes, sir, oh yes – I will get that right away!" And as the pig receded in amongst the shelves Ron's eyes gleamed with delight. Cherry Bliss was truly a wonderful experience that he could never pass up. It took only a couple of minutes for the pig to come back, his arms fully laden with Ron's meal and the possible condiment choices for it. As Ron began to dig in the pig hovered about him, "That's right my little darling, dig in." And when Ron would have cause to wipe his face the pig would beat him to it, his napkin always at hand. After finishing the last chicken leg and the final piece of bobka, which had been slathered in butter, Ron let out a content sigh.

"Thanks for the meal, er, Mr. Pig, sir." He floundered, realizing that he did not know the creature's name, "Um, do you know a way out of here?"

The pig looked shocked, "Oh, no sir, you must not leave yet! You must try my dessert! It's my own recipe…. Oh please do stay, I need some one to tell me what they think of it and I'm afraid that poltergeist will be of no help! Please?"

And Ron, figuring that since the pig had been kind enough to feed him, agreed to try the dessert as long as the pig showed him out afterwards. The deal was made and moments later Ron was presented with a luxurious looking personal sized chocolate cake. "Woah that looks great!" said Ron, eagerly picking up his knife and cutting out a bit of it. However, once he took the first bite he remembered that looks can be and often are deceiving. The icing was not bad; in fact it would've been quite delicious had the cake beneath it not tasted like sand that had been hit with a drying spell.

"So? What do you think? Really tasty, right?" asked the pig excitedly.

"Well," said Ron, in the most thoughtful voice he could manage, "the icing's really, really good. But the cake's a bit dry." A look of outrage crossed the pig's face and Ron realized that he had said the wrong thing. "I – I'm sure you can fix it up easy! Just add a little more milk that's all… or - or maybe my throat's just dry, yeah! That must be it, there mustn't be anything wrong with your cake – I must just need more soda or something, sorry!"

"Why you ungrateful little rascal!" the pig's voice was rather shrilly, "That icing was store bought! How dare you insult my cake, OH YOU LITTLE, COME BACK HERE!"

It was a madhouse. Ron was dashing one way, the pig hobbling after him in a frenzy of a pursuit. There was shouting and cursing, and quite a few random remarks made by a floating dish sponge, who was watching the whole scene play out. As Ron rounded a corner by a stack of washcloths he felt that he was safe. He appeared to have lost the pig, so he took a few moments to pant and catch his breath. Soon, however, he realized that the breath on his neck could not possibly be his own, as that would've required some rather tricky alignment work with mirrors. He turned around and saw to his horror, the pig hanging upside down from a bunch of shelves that he had been resting on.

"Gotcha," the pig snarled, flipping off the shelves and grabbing Ron. "We'll just see how much you criticize my cooking once you see how hard it really is! There won't be any spices needed with you, I daresay, your red hair indicates that you are spicy enough."

It was now that Ron was marveling at his mind, because rather than being frightened out of its wits right off the bat, it had thought of how much the pig looked like Vernon Dursley, Harry's uncle, and then it had gone into a frightened panic. Quite odd, really. Without even noticing it Ron began to scream, he could not really tell what he was screaming, and was only vaguely aware that it got louder once the pig had bound his wrists and stood him neatly inside a giant cauldron. As the pig began to fill it Ron saw a figure that he believed was Harry, and so he began directing his voice towards the figure. Luckily it was Harry, and before Ron really was able to comprehend the situation he was unbound and the pig had cut off part of his tongue. On gut instinct alone Ron shot a stunning spell and the pig dropped to the floor. Once the pig was vanquished Ron came to his senses. "Come on," he said, "Let's find Hermione."

"So you've been in here the whole time?" questioned Harry, stepping over the still bound cat.

"Yeah," said Ron, pausing to look at the cat for a moment and then hustling to keep up with Harry. "I tried to get out, but then that pig started feeding me and er, I didn't like his cake so I, er-"

"- Told him and wound up in his cauldron." Harry cut in, finishing Ron's sentence like only a best friend can, "Well, I got stalled by that cat, so I guess there's no harm done there. Any ideas where Hermione would be?"

Ron thought for a moment and then said, "Well, knowing her she'd be in the library."

"Yeah, well I thought that, but …" and Harry went on to tell Ron about his trip to the Room of Requirement, and the idea that the library was a forbidden place, because it probably contained the way to dismantle the castle's dark curse.

"Well, can't we check there anyway?" Ron asked stubbornly, "It wouldn't hurt, now would it?"

Harry grimaced, "We should probably check near the dungeons first. It would make sense that she'd be waiting there for us, since that's where we need to eventually be anyway. The only problem with checking out the library… if it does cause another wind…."

"Then from now on," stated Ron, "we should hold hands, so that if any place we go has a windy tendency then we'll at least have some chance of sticking together."

And so the plan was set, Harry and Ron grasped hands firmly and began to walk boldly towards the dungeon.


End file.
